Not Pockets

A new semester is full of new things, but I wasn't prepared for the moment I walked into the convenience store and discovered that they no longer stocked hot pockets. What am I going to eat for my unhealthy midnight snack if not a mass of meat and melted cheese inside a pastry pocket?

I bought some other microwave snack and was flabbergasted when I saw the cooking instructions: cook for two minutes in the microwave, then seven minutes in the oven. What's up with that? If I wanted to be doing complex cooking, I would be eating meringues and yorkshire pudding.

Of course, what I'm talking about here isn't an actual problem, but a demonstration of the rightful place of hot pockets in any good frozen aisle. In a market where food designed for convenience, requiring lazy college kids to place something in a microwave, wait, remove it from the microwave, place it in the oven, and wait some more has to be the death of success.